Poll: You're cursed and will die if you don't pick one of these. Which do you pick?

Face and butt trade places.

One big super boob that spurts poop.

Lower body like a porcupine's.

Retardation.

Elbows the size of your head and weigh 200lbs each.

Whenever someone says your name, you fart.

A second head on your shoulder that tries to boss you around.

Grandma flab and cellulite with no possibilty of removing it.

Death--no afterlife.